Whether
you're looking to hide your personal activities from prospective
employers or you just don't want last Friday's naked wood-chopping
contest making the rounds on the internet, getting rid of embarrassing
online photos, videos, and messages can be tough. Here's how you can
take action when you want to purge the internet of your shameful content
and maintain your upstanding online reputation.
Google executive chairman Eric Schmidt famously said, "If you have
something that you don't want anyone to know, maybe you shouldn't be
doing it in the first place." His advice probably is your best course of
action if you never want to be embarrassed again in your life, but it's
also a good way to never have fun again. In fact, for most of us, there
are certain embarrassments we're happy to share with certain folks but
not others. At some point we've all had something to hide, but the
internet makes that difficult. In this post we're going to take a look
at how you can retake your privacy (or at least greatly improve it) and
control your online reputation.
First we'll take a look at Facebook, the most popular social network on
the planet and subsquently home to some of your most embarrassing
photos, public arguments, and so on. Then we'll look at controlling what
shows up on the web in general.
Get Embarrassing Content Removed from Facebook
Facebook
wants to be the place where you share everything, but there are some
moments in life you'd probably rather keep private. You can certainly
prevent yourself from posting embarrassing drunk photos or a love letter
you sent to a crush in high school, but you can't control other people.
When a friend, family member, or enemy posts content you don't want
anyone to see, here are the steps you need to take to get it removed.
Stage One: Use Facebook's Built-in Content Removal Tools

While
Facebook won't let you delete content uploaded by another person, it
will allow you to ensure it doesn't show up anywhere on your profile,
wall, or photo stream. It's very easy to un-tag yourself in wall post by
clicking the little gear icon that appears when you hover over a
particular message. This gear's drop-down menu will give you three
useful choices: remove from profile, remove tag, and remove/mark as
spam. The differences between these three options are relatively minor.
If a post is only showing up on your wall because you were tagged in it,
removing the tag is enough to make it disappear from your page. If
someone posted to your wall, specifically, you'll want to
remove the post from your profile. If the post or tagged message on your
wall is an ad or something that very much doesn't belong on your
profile and comes from somebody you don't know, you'll want to mark it
as spam instead. You could also use this option to get back at someone
who deliberately tried to embarrass you, because they can get in trouble
with Facebook if they have enough messages designated as spam, but
that's not a very nice thing to do.

If
you want to remove a photo from your profile and/or wall, the process
is very similar. Just click on the embarrassing photo so you can view it
and look for the options on the bottom right. If the photo is on your
profile, you'll see a check mark and some text to let you know. Beside
that text is a subtle link that says "Remove." Clicking it will keep
this photo out of your profile's photo albums and photo stream. Further
down you'll also see an option call "Report/Remove Tag." This is what
you want to click to prevent this photo showing up as one of the photos
you're tagged in and anywhere on your wall. You can remove the tag for
no reason at all, but you'll also be asked if the photo is
harassing you or a friend. Additionally, you can use this same function
to report nudity, hate speech, and more. Basically, this one link is
designed to handle reporting any photo that breaches Facebook's terms of
use and/or your desire for personal privacy.
In the event that the problem photo is not terribly extreme, however,
and you just don't want it showing up as one of the top five photos on
your profile, you can remove it very easily. Just hover over that
photo's thumbnail on your page and click the little "X" that appears in
the top right corner.
These are the most common types of embarrassing
content you'd want to remove and report, but Facebook provides similar
tools for just about anything on the site. For instructions on dealing
with embarrassing groups, fake profiles, and more, check out Facebook's
content reporting FAQ.
Stage Two: Ask Your Friend to Remove the Embarrassing Content
Once
you've done everything you can using Facebook's privacy tools, your
next step should be to talk to the person who posted the embarrassing
content regardless of your relationship. Even if you don't get along
with the poster, s/he may be willing to remove it if you make a simple,
kind request. Send them a polite message on Facebook requesting removal.
Even if you get no response or a refusal, asking kindly demonstrates
that you made a reasonable effort to get the content removed yourself.
Be sure to take screenshots of the message should you need a copy
sometime down the road.
Stage Three: Contact Facebook
There
are many reasons a friend, enemy, or family member will want to keep
the embarrassing content on their profile. If you've tried to reason
with them and this content still upsets you greatly and Facebook's
automated methods have gotten you nowehere, you can try to contact
Facebook with a complaint. Unfortunately, Facebook does not provide an
official means of actually contacting a human and doesn't promise a
response. That said, you still have a few options:
- Post in the help discussions to get advice from other Facebook users and occassionally from Facebook staff.
- Submit a complaint via the Facebook Intellectual Property Infringement Form.
In the event the offending content is a photo, you can report that you
did not give the person posting this photo permission to use your
likeness in any way and want it removed.
- Submit a complaint via the Facebook Terms Violation Reporting Form.
This form was designed to help people who can't access their accounts
and need a means of getting help. You're supposed to use the
aforementioned help discussions in the event you can still log in. If
you're having issues with content removal, however, the help discussions
may not be too helpful. Rather than give up, open a private browsing
session or log out of your Facebook account to access this page and
submit your issue.
- Call Facebook headquarters at (650) 543-4800. If you press 1
for customer support, you'll just be notified that they do not offer it.
(Thanks a lot, Facebook.) If you know a law enforcement officer that
can call for you, they can press 2 and get a response in a couple of
days. If you don't, try pressing 7 for "all other inquiries" and leaving
a message. Chances are you won't hear back, but if you have an extreme
situation that you can't take to the police this is worth a shot.
- Send an email to info@support.facebook.com. Back when
Facebook provided proper email support you'd reach them via this
address. This address seems to be active, but few people have had any
success in using it. If you're completely out of options, use it as a
last-ditch effort.
For more ways to contact Facebook regarding specific issues, check out this note.
Stage Four: Beef Up Your Privacy Settings
If
you don't want embarrassing content posted on your profile page or
wall, take preemptive measures and block it in advance. Facebook allows
you to prevent others from posting to your wall and more, so if you're
concerned about a particular individual or group of people just block
certain privileges in advance.
To do this, you need to start by
accessing your Privacy Settings. These are easy to find by going to the
top right part of any page and clicking on the downward facing triangle
(pictured to the right). This will reveal a menu where you can click
Privacy Settings. From there you have a few relevant options.
How You Connect
is the first and possibly only section you're going to need. Towards
the bottom you'll find options allowing you to limit who can post on
your wall and see wall posts by the people you allow. Setting this to
"Friends" is often a safe bet, so only your public messages are visible
and only you can see content contributed by others. Alternatively you
can choose "Custom" and give access to only people in a specific
Facebook List. While this won't remove the content, it'll make it much
harder for people to actually find.
The
How Tags Work section provides you with several options to help
prevent unwanted tagging of photos, messages, and more. You can turn on
"Profile Review" and "Tag Review" so that you get to approve every tag
before it's allowed to become active.
Finally, the Manage Blocking section will allow you to block
users from interacting with you in any way. You'll find this option at
the bottom of the page and will only want to use it in extreme
circumstances. It's important to remember that while it will prevent
them from tagging you in embarrassing content, it won't prevent them
from posting it.
For more Facebook privacy tips, be sure to check out our always up-to-date guide on managing your Facebook privacy.
Remove or Bury Unwanted Search Results
The fastest way to drudge
up embarrassing information about anyone—whether they're on Facebook or
not—is by hitting up your search engine of choice (although there are
plenty of other methods). When your own shameful content shows up in
Google, you can't always get it removed but there is plenty you can do
to bury it.
Step One: Attempt to Get the Content Officially Removed
When
you want embarrassing content out of a search engine, it helps to start
at the source. Contact the web site where the content resides and
simply ask them to remove it. Once it's off the site it'll fall out of
the search results in due time. In the event the web site won't comply
or you just want to be doubly sure your content won't show up, you can
send a request to the search engine to have it removed. Most search
engines offer this service. Here are instructions for Google, and Google
Images, Bing. Some smaller search engines, like Duck Duck Go, have a
standard contact form for all issues. If the page with embarrassing
content is actually one you made, however, Bing has a support document
that shows you how to tell search engines to avoid indexing it. When
it's your pages that you don't want showing up in search results, follow
those instructions.
In extreme situations, you can submit a legal
complaint to Google. Google tends to respond to these legal complaints
with quick removal, not taking much effort to investigate. This can be
good for you if you want something removed, but bad for the person whose
page is being removed as the appeal process can take a long time. You
don't want to go this route unless someone is using your likeness
without your consent, using your work without permission, defaming you,
or potentially breaking the law in another way.
Step Two: Bury the Unwanted Content So Nobody Can Find It
When
it comes to hiding something you don't want others to see, "noise" can
be your best friend. One embarrassing photo is very easy to see when
you're staring right at it, but when it's beside tons of other photos it
gets lost pretty quickly, especially if you have to scroll on and on
just to figure out where it is. If you can't get rid of something in a
search engine, your best bet is to create more interesting and
legitimate content to push it down and out of the way.
One
of the easiest ways to make this happen is to create profiles and pages
on popular social sites like Twitter, YouTube, Vimeo, Flickr, Google+,
Blogger, and so on, so your content will be indexed and show up in
search results. Just be sure to use your real name so that the videos,
photos, messages, or whatever you post are associated with that name.
As we've previously discussed, registering your name as a domain name
and putting up a name plate web site can help you reclaim what shows up
in your search results. Just be sure to add links to your web site on
other social sites to help increase its page rank.
You'll need to
actually manage your online reputation once you have it set up so your
content rises above the embarrassing stuff you can't destroy. This
doesn't require much more than actually using the services you sign up
for and posting only things you want others to see. If you have a
problem posting responsibly, install Internet Shame Insurance to get a
warning before you post content you'll regret.